Death (and Further Adventures) of Silas Winterbottom : The Body Thief

And you thought your family was strange. I am dying. . . I might get the chance to know you before death takes me...I would like you to be my guest at Sommerset. . .I have enclosed a check for $ 10,000. . . Should you accept my offer... Uncle Silas has always been greedy, evil, insulting, and extremely rich! But a dying uncle with a vast fortune is definitely one worth getting to know. Even if it means spending 2 months on his secluded island home with a houseful of suspicious servants and a hungry pet crocodile. But what is Uncle Silas really up to? Will Adele, Milo, and Isabella outlive Uncle Silas to inherit his money? And just who is that mysterious "guest" in his basement? Is it worth the money (or their lives) to stick around and find out?

<p>From Chapter One: Adele Fester-Winterbottom Gets Mail </p><p>Washington, a stocky black bulldog, was licking at the saucer of milk and purring softly when Mr. Walter Fester entered the kitchen muttering to himself about the outrageous price of eggs. Washington, through no fault of his own, was a dog who firmly believed that he was a cat.</p><p>"How's a person meant to enjoy his morning eggs when they've cost him an extra fifteen cents on the dozen," said Mr. Walter Fester irritably. "You'd think we were <i>made </i>of money. I shall write to the newspaper about this. Oh, before I forget," said Mr. Fester, putting on a bright yellow apron, "this came for you."</p><p>He handed his daughter an envelope. It was royal blue with a thin silver band along the border. As letters went, it looked rather important.</p><p>"For me?" said Adele curiously.</p><p>Her mother looked up from the pages of her scientific journal. "For <i>her?</i>" She narrowed her unnaturally large eyes. "Who on earth would send Adele a letter?"</p><p>Who indeed? Adele examined the envelope in her hands. It was addressed as follows:</p><p><i>Miss Adele Fester-Winterbottom</i><br><i>399 Possum Avenue</i><i>,</i><br><i>Tipping Point</i><br><i>Tasmania</i><i>, Australia</i></p><p>On the other side, pressed into the seal of the envelope, was an engraved crest—it featured a set of ornate gates entwined with the vines of a rosebush. Etched across the crest was the word <i>Sommerset</i>.</p><p>Something about the letter made her feel nervous and excited all at once. She thought about letting her father read it for her, but Mr. Fester was busy enough scrambling eggs <i>and </i>shuffling through the sizable mountain of unpaid bills and final notices on the kitchen counter.</p><p>Back in Scotland, before everything had gone so horribly wrong, Mr. Fester had been a respected book restorer with an international reputation. It was a passion Adele had shared with her father, but now the business was long gone and there were very few books sent his way anymore.</p><p>You are probably wondering exactly what disaster befell the family to cause their complete financial ruin.</p><p>For the answer, look no further than the scrawny woman with the irritable expression and the wild mop of charcoal-colored hair sitting at the far end of the table. Adele's mother, Professor Prudence Fester-Winterbottom, was a deeply unpleasant woman with sour breath. She was also something of a genius and her specialty was animal behavior. Her groundbreaking research at MacDougall University in Edinburgh was acclaimed worldwide and over the years her reputation and public standing flourished, much to her delight.</p><p>Unfortunately, the only thing the professor craved more than glory was money. Prudence had spent a lifetime envying her older brother Silas Winterbottom and his massive fortune. So when, during an experiment into the physiology of birds, she discovered a way to dramatically alter the physical appearance of a common tree sparrow, a rather diabolical idea began to form in her mind.</p><p>The professor realized that by putting the tree sparrow through a series of rather painful and highly unethical operations she could give it the appearance of a wallop lark—the rarest bird on the face of the earth <i>and </i>the most valuable. Each feathered impostor could be sold for a small fortune.</p><p>She would be rich!</p><p>In a remote basement laboratory in the bowels of the university, the professor and her assistant Paul gathered a test group of twelve tree sparrows and began their highly unethical operation in earnest. They worked late at night to avoid detection and in no time at all had successfully created the first batch of mutant wallop larks. The professor arranged for a rather lucrative sale through a friend of Paul's who knew several notorious bird smugglers. The profit on the first dozen alone would be in excess of one hundred thousand dollars!</p><p>However, as the days passed, the birds began to exhibit rather violent tendencies not typically associated with the peaceful wallop lark. Their beaks and claws grew rapidly, sharp as razor blades, and soon all twelve birds had to be separated for fear that they would devour one another, so insatiable were their appetites.</p><p>Fearing that worst, Paul begged the professor to abandon the project and destroy the birds, but she refused, unwilling to turn her back on all of that beautiful money.</p><p>On the day of the sale, Professor Fester-Winterbottom arrived early at the university to check up on Paul, who had been working throughout the night to prepare the birds for transportation. When the professor entered the basement laboratory she made a discovery so horrific, it snatched all the strength from her legs, sending her plummeting to the ground. Paul's body lay sprawled on the floor, largely hidden beneath the swarm of rabid wallop larks devouring his flesh. With ruthless efficiency they were eating him piece by piece, stripping the bones clean.</p><p>The birds had used their powerful beaks to chew through the locks on the cages. They had waited patiently until Paul's back was turned before striking. He did not stand a chance against their savage hunger.</p><p>Unable to conceal the horror of what she had done, the professor was forced to confess everything to the university. The press jumped on the sensational story. Headlines screamed, Birdbrained Professor Creates Killer Sparrows!</p><p>Not surprisingly, the university was sued by Paul's grief-stricken family. In turn the university sued the professor for every penny she was worth and then some. Desperate to bury the scandal, the university convinced Scotland Yard not to pursue the case, and the investigation was quietly closed.</p><p>Not that it mattered. The professor's reputation was utterly destroyed.</p><p>Broke and desperate, Adele and her parents fled Scotland and sought refuge in the only place that would have them—Tipping Point, Tasmania.</p><p>Pushing those dark memories from her mind, Adele reached down and patted Washington on the head; the bulldog purred gratefully. Washington was an unfortunate victim of an early experiment carried out by the professor. She was convinced that she could reprogram a domesticated dog, replacing its canine instincts with those of a cat. While the experiment had been a triumph (Washington was completely transformed, purring and meowing like a lifelong fluff-ball) it quickly became apparent that the professor was unable to reverse the effects, thus condemning the stocky bulldog to life as a cat.</p><p>Adele looked again at the envelope in her hand. She felt a ripple of excitement. Who <i>had </i>written to her? With some care, she broke the seal and read the letter.</p><p><i>Dear Adele,</i></p><p><i>This letter may come as something of a surprise as we have never met. Time, however, is not on my side, so allow me to get straight to the point. I am dying and it is my wish that I might get the chance to know you, at least a little, before death takes me. I would like you to be my guest at Sommerset for two months beginning in June. I have enclosed a check for $10,000 to cover the necessary travel arrangements and additional expenses. Should you accept my offer, I will expect you no later than June 1.</i></p><p><i>If the answer is no, I shall not trouble you again. The money is yours to spend in any way you wish.</i></p><p><i>Regards,</i><br><i>Your Uncle,</i><br><i>Silas Winterbottom</i></p>