Chapter One

It was one of those parties that would live on in the collectivememory, ripening over the years with significance and irony; aparty that would launch a hundred favorite anecdotes and changelives. But to actually experience it was hell. It was full of tomorrow'scelebs and high-fliers, yesterday's love affairs and embarrassments.The laughter was loud and the talk thunderous, the noise almostdrowning out the din from the music deck but not making a dent inthe clash of egos.

Katie sipped at her paper cup of sweet punch again because she'dforgotten how disgusting it was. Ex-boyfriend number three, Hugh,was bellowing at her over the thumping bass. She hadn't seen him forfour years, and was frowning so hard to hear him that she looked asif she was straining. Hugh did not have a naturally loud voice, butwhat he lacked in ability he made up for in motivation.

"... but the annual bonus," he trumpeted, "you see, is a goldenhandcuff."

"A golden what?"

"Handcuff. Uncouth to go into details, but they really know whatthey're doing."

"Excellent. So, how is -- "

"I mean put it this way, we're talking more than -- "

And then he did an impression of a person whose trousers had beenset on fire. Katie was impressed. He'd rarely been so interesting. As here-landed, the grinning face of their hostess, Sandy, appeared besidehim. It was Sandy's engagement party and she was very, very drunk.

"Hello everybody!" she greeted them. "Hello Hugh-Poo. If Iwasn't a taken woman, you'd be in trouble."

Hugh gave a tight smile. "Anyway, if you'll excuse me." His voicewas slightly pained.

"Oh dear," said Sandy. "You're not leaving on my account, are you?"

"No, no," said Hugh. "I must just ..." As he limped off, Sandyturned to Katie.

"It's so hard not to do it to him," she whispered into Katie's left eye.

"I know."

"It's his face."

"I know."

"How am I going to be mature enough to get married?"

"Show me the ring again!"

Sandy extended her hand in glee and Katie ooh-ed at the beautifuldiamond in its platinum setting. As she did so, Geraldine, Sandy'sflatmate, appeared as if from nowhere.

"Oh my God," she muttered. "You're not still showing that thingoff are you?"

They looked up at her.

"Hello Gerry," greeted Katie. "Sprinkling happy fairy-dust allaround, as usual?"

Ignoring Katie, Geraldine looked down at her flatmate. "Peoplewill think you're getting married for all the wrong reasons, youknow."

Sandy gave a regretful look at her ring. "I just think it's beautiful."She gave a little sigh.

"It is!" squealed Katie. "Let me see it again."

Sandy, never one to stay unhappy for long, extended her handagain, as Geraldine tutted. "Have you been remembering to take pictures?"she asked.

Sandy gasped, "Oh no!" She rushed off on heels that seemed tohave turned her ankles to sponge.

"I knew it," Geraldine said to Katie. "All that money on thenewest digital camera and she hasn't taken one shot. Money toburn."

"You know, you should be careful," warned Katie. "People willthink you're jealous."

It was Geraldine's turn to gasp. "Me? Jealous? Are you mad? Iwouldn't marry that man unless he ... I don't know ..."Katie raised her eyebrows. "Proposed?"

Geraldine sighed. "Piss off." She took a gulp of punch and then grimaced. "I told her she put too much sugar in this. It's like medicine,"she said before finishing it in one. "I just assumed I'd get marriedbefore her."

"Do you want to talk about it?" asked Katie.

Then Geraldine was off. "All the way through college -- threegoddam years -- I had to listen to her pathetic relationship problems-- that girl has the emotional maturity of a boohbah. I could becomea relationship counselor just off the back of being her flatmate.The hours I wasted listening to her waffle. And all the time," shetook a deep breath, "I thought I was on to a sure-fire thing with thatwanker. A man whose idea of commitment is to buy a newspaper. Mr.Emotional-Retard."

"Well," sighed Katie, "you should have guessed from his name."

"And can you believe," squeaked Geraldine, "two years togetherand he chucks me during a Pizza Express meal -- a Pizza Expressmeal -- and then comes to the party tonight?"

"Your ex?"

"Yes. You know what he is, don't you?"

"An emotional retard?"

"He's a fucking emotional retard."

"So, where is he?" Katie looked round the expanse of oak-flooredroom.

"In the corner," said Geraldine. "Don't look!" She yanked theback of Katie's halter-neck dress. "Jesus, Katie, I don't want him tothink we're talking about him. He's arrogant enough already."

"Did you invite him?" choked Katie, rearranging herself.

"Of course I did. We're good friends. I'm completely over him."

"As long as no one looks at him."

"All right then, Miss Smarty-pants. I'll introduce you -- and thenyou can tell me what an emotional retard you think he is."

"Ooh, I can't wait. Lead on McMadwoman."

Just as they turned round, Hugh blocked their path. He gavethem both a big grin and Geraldine abandoned Katie to his monologue.

"Right," he said. "Goolies all straightened. Now, where was I?"

Despite herself, after talking to Hugh for a while Katie rememberedwhy she'd been able to stay with him for so long. Ten monthsand three weeks to be precise. There was a comfy solidity about him,a warm reassurance that seemed to emanate from his M&S cardi ...The Waitress. Copyright © by Melissa Nathan. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.

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Excerpted from The Waitress by Melissa Nathan
All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.